


this vessel is a lie

by sadieblodgett



Category: Animorphs - Katherine A. Applegate
Genre: Canonical Character Death, F/M, Snippets, but they're probably around 15?, playing it fast and loose with ages here
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-02-28
Updated: 2019-02-28
Packaged: 2019-11-06 23:08:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 996
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17948927
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sadieblodgett/pseuds/sadieblodgett
Summary: fragments of moments, during the war and after.





	this vessel is a lie

**Author's Note:**

> i miss these sad kids and i can never find content for them so here's a few snippets that exist in and outside of canon. been awhile since i've read, so let me know if i forgot anything important.

He lives for these moments, he thinks. The swell of wind beneath his wings and the echo of Rachel's laughter in his head. They swoop and dive against the blue California sky, together and oh so alone. The stretch of humanity lays far below. Lately, they haven't had as much time together as he would like, with Jake and the war dominating any free moment. He's been fraying at the edges, desperate for a chance to be alone with her, alone with the sky. He's become even more of a solitary creature in the past few years and appreciates solitude when he can get it. Still, being alone with Rachel is far better than being alone with himself.

 _Tobias!_ She lets out a whoop of pure joy as she dives and snaps back up in an upstream. _God, I've missed this._

 _I've missed you._ he says.

And he has. Seeing her every day is something, but it's not enough. That's Battle Rachel, and though he loves her too, he's missed the Rachel that laughs when she falls.

_Hmm. You miss me Birdboy? How about now?_

She shoots off, leaving him alone amongst the clouds with no choice but to follow. Her bald eagle morph gives her a bit of speed over him, but he can tell that she's giving him a chance to catch up.

 _Where are you taking us?_ It hasn't escaped his notice that she's been driving them in a specific direction for a while now.

 _You'll see._ she thinks cryptically at him.

Finally, after what feels like ages of staring after her at her feathered head, she lands them in a clearing in a densely wooded area. Set up in the grass are a blanket and a basket. A storybook picnic, warm and inviting.

He turns to look at Rachel, who's demorphed and watches him with a faint smile.

"Happy birthday, Tobias."

He morphs human but he's still speechless when she sets her hand on his cheek.

"You forgot?"

"I'm sorry, it’s been so busy lately, with Jake and- I didn't forget, I just didn't remember!"

"Relax Tobias, its okay. I'm here and I remembered." She pulls him close. "I'm here."

But it's not okay. What kind of person forgets their own birthday? Except he's not a person, no matter how hard he tries for her, and he can't help but remember the constant ticking clock on his own humanity. He steps out of her embrace, looking away to hide his expression. He can't help but notice her proud chin tremble out of the corner of his eyes and _shit_. He's a shit boyfriend, all he'd wanted was this one day with her, separate from everything else.

"Rachel. I'm sorry."

"Stop apologizing. You didn't do anything wrong."

"I can think of at least three things I've done wrong today." She glares up at him, ready to defend his honor. "The most important of which, is that I haven't thanked you yet."

The fight leaves her eyes, replaced with something a hell of a lot better. He grabs her hips and tugs her back towards him.

"Oh yeah? And how do you plan to do that?" Her nose brushes his and her hair is soft and heavy in his hands. "Maybe something a little like-"

He kisses her and oh. This is better than flying. Better than anything else in his life. Probably better than anything else ever will be. Her teeth scrape his lips and her fingers pull at his suit. They stumble their way towards the blanket she'd laid out earlier, unable to pull away from each other. Rachel trips over the basket and they collapse, him on top of her, with a knee between her legs and a hand above her head. He swallows her laugh and palms her ribs. Her giggles turn into moans and he loses himself in the taste of her.

-

Later, they lay tucked into each other on a decidedly more rumpled blanket. Tobias rubs his hand down her arm and feels goosebumps.

"If this is what picnics are, we should be having them more often."

She swats at him.

"This was a special birthday picnic. You can have another one in a year."

Neither of them mention that a year is a long time when you're fighting in a war.

"A whole year? You can't expect me to wait that long, Rachel, honestly," he whines.

"I think you might be a little confused on the definition of picnic. Let me educate you."

She reaches past him for the basket, but he doesn't let her, grabbing her hand and pulling it up to his lips.

"Your lesson will have to wait. Give me a moment." He looks up pointedly at the birds circling above them.

"Right. You do your thing. I'll set up your birthday meal."

He drops a kiss on her head as he makes his way towards the trees at the edge of the clearing. She swipes a slap at his ass and misses but her giggles follow him out into the forest as he demorphs and morphs back into his human form.

This isn't their first time and he's glad for it. He doesn't miss the awkwardness of it all. As uncomfortable as he is in his own skin sometimes, he's found that being with her is familiar and exhilarating, a different type of exhilaration than either of them are used to.

Tobias walks back towards Rachel, happy to see that she's made minimal efforts at redressing herself. Her hair is golden in the afternoon sunlight and _god_ she's beautiful. He has to stop and remind himself that this is what it’s all for. These quiet, stolen moments as just Tobias and Rachel, apart from all the fear and violence. He might not be quite a human anymore, but she reminds of all that he still is.

"What's up, weirdo?" She's radiant then, always, and he's a goner.

Tobias joins her on the blanket.

**Author's Note:**

> follow my tumblr @spacespicegirl if u wanna cry abt animorphs w me


End file.
